


Choices

by poppetawoppet



Category: American Idol RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-19
Updated: 2009-11-19
Packaged: 2017-10-27 01:26:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/290101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poppetawoppet/pseuds/poppetawoppet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>um, our four heroes get stranded on a desert island, and things don't go well</p>
            </blockquote>





	Choices

  


Adam opened his eyes even though it seemed as if he shouldn't be able to. The sand was everywhere now, encrusting his eyelashes even. The heat had made everything heavy, given even his breathing weight.

He hadn't dreamed in weeks now, although time was relative. It felt like weeks but it could have been months. Seconds. Hours. So many days.

Hysterical laughter bubbled up again and the form next to him stirred. Adam ran his hand over Kris's hair, trembling more than he would have liked.

"Adam."

Kris's voice was thick and low. He had been sleeping too much lately. Old fears ran anew and Adam refused to look behind him to the center of the island. It was too much.

"Hey Kris."

"I don't feel good"

"I know." Adam tried to keep the hitch out of his voice.

"There's a black spot on my left toe."

Adam closed his eyes again, leaning his head against the tree. Images played, images that he wanted to forget.

 _"Oh my god ewwwwwwww!!!" Allison screamed._

 _"What?" Adam sighed. He loved Alli, but being stuck on an island with her_ …

 _"There's something on my toe!"_

 _"Must be something we ate, cause I got one too," Matt laughed, waving his bare foot in the air. "Either that or we're being taken over by ALIENS"_

They had laughed then.

"Kris—"

"Adam, I've got it too."

"Kris," the hitch was there now.

"I don't…" Kris blinked, tears washing streaks down his face. "I don't want it to be like that."

 _Alli and Matt had been sluggish lately too tired to move. The black had spread to their legs. It didn't smell so it wasn't gangrene. But the first aid kit had died with the plane, and help was certainly not coming anytime soon._

 _"Adam," Kris whispered urgently, "Something is wrong here. It's Alli and Matt."_

 _"What? They're tired."_

 _"Not anymore."_

 _Adam looked over to their makeshift camp and saw Allison and Matt running around. He would have smiled, except for the desperation in their eyes, the fact that they looked exhausted, but would not stop._

"Don't talk like that, Kris, help is coming."

"I hope not. What if we brought it off the island?"

Adam looked into Kris's eyes, and he had never even considered the possibility. It frightened him.

 _"Alli, you need to rest!"_

 _"I feel great Adam! Fantastic!"_

 _There is a shine in her eyes that is unnatural, almost as if she had been doing drugs. Matt had the same look in his eyes, his hair sticking up, his natural humor now seeming slightly sick and off putting._

 _"I'm hungry, are you hungry Alli?" Matt asked._

 _"Yeah. We should eat something."_

 _They had been hungry since they had crashed here three weeks earlier. Why today was any different…_

 _Then their heads turned, predatory and Adam swallowed. He watched as they both rose, fluid and dangerous. He began to back up, his feet sliding underneath him. He saw Kris approaching._

 _"Run!" He yelled._

 _Of course Kris ran to him._

"So what do we do?" Adam whispered.

Kris looked up at him, the words in his eyes.

"No," Adam said.

"I can't do it."

"Why not?"

Kris sat up, struggling. He grabbed for the makeshift knife they had made from a rock, the one stained still with blood. He laid the sharp edge against his wrists as if to slice. His whole body convulsed, throwing the rock, twitching helplessly as Adam rushed to his side.

"Kris. Please, I can't do it. Not again. At least I had self-defense to excuse myself for then."

 _Kris was on Matt's back, wrestling for control. He is bruised and covered in bites. He had rushed in, only to be rewarded with a double assault. Adam had pulled Alli off, holding her down, but he couldn't hold her and help Kris._

 _He looked down at Alli. "Its okay baby, we'll get you help."_

 _Kris fell to the ground and Adam let go for a second. Allison took advantage and squirmed from beneath him. She took his hand, biting into his wrist. Adam screamed, and grabbed for her instinctively. When he heard her neck snap, he looked up, seeing Matt limp beneath Kris's hands._

 _It was over._

"I don't want to hurt you."

"You already are by asking Kris."

"It's either now or later. You choose."

"That isn't fair."

They look at each other for what seems like hours. Kris breaks his gaze first, looking down at his hands. His chest hitches. He looked up, his eyes already slightly glowing.

"Please Adam. Please. And-"

"There's more? You have got to be fucking kidding me."

Kris shook his head once, taking Adam's hand in his own. "You probably have it too, you know."

Adam flinched then, nodded once.

"Do me a favor and don't let it spread before you can do something about it. I don't want you dying like that. Please."

It was too much. Kris had always asked too much of him. But he was right.

 _They were entangled together, one beginning just as the other ended. Adam remembered Kris pressing against him, sobs wracking his body._

 _"Please, I need to feel. Please."_

 _It had been hard and fast and desperate, less sex than rubbing up against each other and holding so tightly there were bruises up and down their arms. But they had felt something other than guilt and horror, even if only for one night._

Adam swallowed. He hefted the rock in his hand. "This is gonna hurt like hell."

"No worse than what happened before."

They both looked at the two graves, then at each other.

"Just do it already Adam."

Adam held Kris's arm carefully, slicing. Kris grimaced, said nothing as the blood began to flow. Adam took the other arm, his vision blurring.

"This isn't how it's supposed to end, you and I."

Kris smiled at him. "Who says this is the end?"

Adam nodded. "Will you be there?"

"For you, I'll always wait."

Kris leaned forward, careful not to touch, pressing his lips lightly against Adam's. Adam wanted to look away. Instead he watched as the sand drank greedily, growing dark and full.

And then it was over. Adam closed his eyes, swallowing. He wasn't very religious, but he prayed anyway. He carefully carried the body to the hole he had dug earlier, covering it with rocks like the other two mounds. They had had no way to mark them, but Adam hoped no one would ever find these last resting places.

He turned looking at the ocean. He wasn't sure he could do this, except he had seen a shadow on his foot today. He swallowed and walked forward. He had promised.

The water was warm, lapping against his feet. He had always loved the ocean, until he had found himself swimming against it all those weeks ago.

He tasted salt, unsure if it was tears or the sea, realizing he didn't care. Everything he had ever loved had been destroyed.

 _Please_ he thought _let me be able to do this_

He felt himself swept under, terrified that he couldn't breathe, relieved he was no longer in control. The fish flashed in front of him, bright colors that reminded him of Alli's hair.

 _"This is so exciting us four together again!" Alli grinned._

 _"Yeah, yeah, you just want to witness Kradam live and in person," Matt grumbled._

 _"It's not as exciting as everyone makes it out to be, "Adam sighed._

 _"It is too," Kris said, squeezing Adam's thigh and wiggling his eyebrows._

Adam broke above water for a moment, gasping for air, wondering if it had all been a dream, if they had just crashed, looking around for the wreckage that wasn't there.

He still felt Kris's lips against his own, still heard his last words.

 _"For you I'll always wait."_

Adam sunk below again, watching the fish flit in front of his eyes. _Please. He's waiting for me._

He saw stars for a moment before he saw nothing again.

 _"This is totally like Lost!" Matt grinned._

 _"Oh yes, plot twists and confusion are my favorite things," Kris said._

 _"Don't worry, they'll come for us, I mean we're famous and shit," Alli lay on the sand._

 _"I'm famous. I don't know about the rest of you all." Adam brushed his shoulders loftily._

 _They all piled on top of him, laughing and wrestling until they fell asleep, holding each other close. They had each other._

 _What could go wrong?_


End file.
